Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers [do not make mismated alliances with them or come under a different yoke with them, inconsistent with your faith]. For what partnership have right living and right standing with God with iniquity and lawlessness? Or how can light have fellowship with darkness? – 2 Corinthians 6:14, Amplified Bible (AMP)

After asking roughly 1,000 Americans ages 65 and older what is most important for a long and happy marriage, Karl Pillemer reported the following key piece of advice in his book, 30 Lessons For Living: Tried and True Advice from the Wisest Americans: marry someone a lot like you.

As Pillemer reports:

I asked hundreds of older Americans what is most important for a long and happy marriage, and their advice was just about unanimous: opposites may attract, but they may not be the best for lasting marriages…you are much more likely to have a satisfying marriage for a lifetime when you and your mate are fundamentally similar…marriage is vastly more difficult with someone whose orientation and approach to life is different from yours. There are many ways partners can be similar, but the experts focus on one dimension in particular: similarity in core values.*

Spouses don’t have to have identical interests, but it is imperative that they share fundamental, core values. As Pillemer writes, “Similarity in core values serves as a form of inoculation against fighting and arguing.”* The more different the core values of spouses are, the more trouble those spouses are likely to have in their marriages.

Once again, reality reflects God’s truth. As God (through Paul) admonishes us in 2 Corinthians, Christians are not to be unequally yoked (partnered) with those who don’t share their Christian values. Although 2 Corinthians is not a “marriage” passage, the lesson of 2 Corinthians (don’t partner with people who don’t share your core values) applies to marriages, business partnerships, friendships, and any other kind of committed relationship you can imagine.

It doesn’t matter how attractive the other person is. It doesn’t matter how much money the other person makes. If you don’t share core values, your relationship will likely be tenuous at best. At worst, it could end, perhaps painfully. Know your own core values, and be sure to research your potential partner’s core values before you commit. If you do, your relationship won’t be perfect (Is anything perfect when humans are involved?), but the odds of it being sweetly fulfilling are much, much higher.

*Excerpt From: Pillemer, Karl. “30 Lessons for Living.” PENGUIN group, 2011-08-19. iBooks.
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